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Control vs Compassion




I think I have a tendency to want to control other people’s lives. It may sound selfish when I see it this way, but I like to think that it’s a subconscious motive that originates in how I see my life and others.

I like to think that what we put out in the world can be overall generalized as ‘energy’. I converse with people, I share things and do certain things with the intent of putting out ‘positive energy’. Hoping that an exchange of opinions or values or forms of expression will assist the people around me to grow in a desirable manner, to grow as a whole.

But sometimes I get carried away. I get into these habitual cycles of sharing certain things or strongly stating my point of view in an effort to change people’s view entirely. This is when the line crosses over to selfish. This is something that I am willing to fix every day. This is something that takes gradual compromise, empathy and understanding. Moreover, this is the source of these things.

We are unable to understand what anyone is going through, no matter how well they try to verbalise it. Because we are all made up of so many moments unique to our own lives that shape us in to who we are. That shape us to understand the world in our own ways.
So I believe it takes skill to find the balance between sharing or wanting to contribute and not crossing the line into control or exertion. Because it is not your role as an individual to change another individual’s life completely. It is your role to contribute your energy, to bounce off ideas and to be flexible with perspectives, regardless of what you or others originally may think. It is your role to understand boundaries of others and to know when to let things be. To me, this is true empathy and understanding.

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