mind & heart = spirit

i only ever feel like i belong when i am talking about or listening to real things real things that matter like why we are on this earth what we can do as a collective to prevent hurt encourage understanding embrace our pains and how no one can really understand you how we only get fragments of eachothers to resonate how we express the parts of us that we hold most valuable in our hearts i guess thats what makes community so isolating and worthwhile at the same time we share bits and pieces but never fully ourselves but theres a paradox in my way of thinking helping people starts from your neighbor but i turn my back on them saying i need to focus on my career to help others whats the point of this hostility a never ending question circling my brain

I tend to fail to live by this  quote. So many thoughts rushing through me at million miles an hour, i feel like i have to catch it all the time. To the point that I don't ever execute an action based on these thoughts. Planning repeatedly, inside my head and outside of it. Planning a course of action, thinking of all possible scenarios.  But this isn't authentic living, I feel like. As discussed in this quote and the book I'm reading (The Consciousness Instinct by Michael Gazzaniga), it is not  thoughts that bring food to the table or that get that task done. It is the physical movement of muscles. It is not thoughts that allow the exploration of art, music and the likes. It is the movements of picking up that pen, that paintbrush, that guitar and physical making something out of it. Of course I find a lot of value in manifestation and visualization. It's important to set straight what it is you want to do... But a task for myself, just forget  that visio...

so much resistance in everything I do blaming fatigue when ive too much sleep cleaned the table twice but not clean enough for me so much possibility and expansion ahead the only way is to propel myself forward but what will happen to it all once i'm long gone and dead the common crisis amongst nihilists yet its so hard for us to deny that we still all crave the same things belonging and affection, appreciation no one has a single clue what this is what it is we are doing here what this will all mean in the end or whether an end exists learning to be okay with that to float through this unknown without fighting against chaos is the biggest strength of all